If You Happen to be around...

Damn, it's been a while! Here are a couple of trailers for some cool films I've seen lately (I guess to make up for lost blogging):

I saw Slumdog Millionaire last night. Here's the trailer (though I think it hardly serves the movie justice, it was a fantastic film!) It's essentially a romance too which I (heart)



Here's the trailer for Fears of the Dark A B&W animated visual orgasm, spooky scary



I'm looking forward to seeing Waltz with Bashir, an animated Lebanese film and animated in a kick-ass style, aw hell, here's the trailer!



Uh! I can't wait! :)

So here's the big news everyone or anyone who managed to get through all of those previews (lol), here's the main fucking attraction if you will...I will not smoke weed in 2009. For me that is a HUGE statement considering the amount and frequency with which I smoke. I am even hoping I will make it. I mean say what you will haters, but there is such a thing as pyschological addiction to marijuana and the mind is a powerful thing. It's my coping mechanism. It is how I relax. I am irritable without it and anytime I've gone a few days (can't remember last time I've gone longer than a week stoned) sober I would experience difficulty sleeping, strange-ass dreams, funky night sweats and the fucking bitch fest of a lifetime! Hooray!

I shouldn't joke about such serious matters. Anyway I'm going to go bake some bread. For real. A Sesame Pumpkin quick Bread!

peas.

Employed at Last!

I start my new job tomorrow and can't wait. While I have enjoyed this brief sojourn from employment, I am ready for this job, which is kinda dreamy. I'm going to be working for a prestigious art institute here in San Francisco in a management capacity. I will be surrounded by artists, intellectuals and the fresh energy that students bring. I can't freaking wait!

So there you have it. Proof positive that one can go from calling your boss a racist to the job of one's dreams at an organization so very fucking different than the one I was working for before. I'm so happy!

Shoe Therapy

I'm not of the retail therapy type usually, but boy oh boy, do I love me some Ross!!! I went in to get a pair of shoes and came out with a couple, all for about $35. I thought it was a steal and I have such cute shoes betch!!!!

Here's an oldie but goodie for ol' times sake...


Anyway, I had a good reason for buying shoes. I am going to a wedding this wknd and needed a cute pair and boy did I get 'em...two of them :)

I am living on borrowed time here and every minute that my phone doesn't ring is that much more cause for anxiety...the days of splurging on two pairs of shoes will soon come to an end. I am only on day three of unemployment and lemme tell ya...it sucks! I like being busy and I am so hungry for a job in higher ed. PLEASE I hope I find one! Enough of my sniveling...it's all about the shoes betch! And remember...

JUST SAY NO TO POINTY TOE...unless you're the Wicked Witch!

Women's Power! Vagina Power!

For the past few months, I've been reading and watching films about birth, particularly modern maternity care in the US and natural birth. The movie that started it all was Ricki Lake and Abby Epstein's "The Business of Being Born" (2007) Go Ricki! Go Ricki!

Here's the trailer, it's amazing!



I must preface this all with,
1) I've never given birth or carried a pregnancy to term.
and
2) because of that I realize that until I have a child of my own, I can never fully understand the magnitude of childbirth. I feel it's like the woman said at the end of the trailer, "Nothing compares to the privilege of giving life and the responsibility of that." That is something I hold true in my heart...I mean to make a life that's a fucking trip and might as well ride the trip until the end...what's crazy is that, after reading up and all, you wonder, "Why is the United States doing things so differently than other countries?" Our births are overmedicalized. How can you labor if you aren't even allowed to move around? Or feel your legs after an epidural for that matter? The whole thing seems very counter-intuitive to me. Besides after witnessing some amazing natural/home births, it's awe-inspiring and beautiful to see women at their most powerful in a way...(this is not to say that birth defines woman, far from it, merely to point at the natural beauty and empowerment of that process)

Anyway, I gotta get to work...I can't wait to have a baby to experience it for myself. Actually, I can wait, let's give it a few years! Maybe I should find a job first!

This is my last week at the ole' cave and I am happy about it. I have two interviews at higher education institutions Thurs and Fri morns. Wish me luck everybody. I hope I knock 'em dead. I have to remember though that this is a long process and to not waste all my best shit on the first interview...

Gotta motor. Peas and Carrots. Der.


P.S. I just found the pic above online, lemme know if it's like some nazi women power shit or i dunno what...

Maria Callas and Other Just Because Downloads

has a beautiful voice and a beautiful face.

I am listening to her sing "Ave Maria," so very lovely.

I spent the morning downloading some tunes. Here's what I'm digging this morn':

Johnny Cash (I didn't download anything new, but I'm feeling very Johnny Cash-ish myself these days.


I'm still having after-glow from Obama's DNC speech. Did you catch Stevie Wonder on before? It was great! I downloaded a bunch of Stevie like "Superstition," "Overjoyed," "Part Time Lover," and "She's a Bad Mamma Jamma," among others. Man, I am SO EXCITED FOR OBAMA TO BE PRESIDENT ALREADY!!!! He HAS to win. McCain was trying to steal some of Obama's fire this week by announcing Sarah Palin as his running mate. Whatever. Fuck Sarah Palin. I am staunchly pro-choice and I hate how it's actually a boon to conserative rw christians that she carried a child w/ Down's Syndrome to term after a amniocentisis...

She is kinda cute though. See www.fish-scale.blogspot.com

Anyway, Stevie rules! Obama rules!


Let me find out Stevie was kinda a papi chuelo back in the day...

Anyway, what started the dowloading frenzy of the day was a desire to her "Last Dance" by Tom Petty.


It's a great song, along with "Roll Another Joint," "Refugee," and "Zombie Zoo." Tom Petty, I no want to petty.

Enjoy your holiday all!

OMG: Did I just do THAT?!

Today I called my boss a racist. I'm not sorry for it in the true sense (meaning, I simply said what I felt to be true), but I am sorry in the adult "gotta-suck-ass-to-get-ahead" kinda way. I'm kicking myself because I know it was a dumb thing to do, but part of me feels like I've lived out some fantasy...AND IT FEELS FUCKING GREAT! Imagine actually telling your boss the most fuck-uped shit you thought of them...makes you smile like a Cheshire Cat, right?

Anyway, it is not so good for my career that there move, but this is not the career I want to be in anyway...ay, what the fuck am I going to do? BTW, this post is by me for me. Usually I have the wherewithal to try and be witty, but this shit stinks. I basically quit and then asked fools if I could think about it over the weekend. I really want to quit. I mean, I am so fucking unhappy there. I can't stand being in that lightless box working for a Catholic organization and all that entails, FUCK THAT! It's not for me! But how am I going to pay my rent? I'll just have to find another job promto and that means I am more apt to take something I don't really care for...I dunno. I know what I instintually want to do: quit. Now, where do I go from there? I can make some meagre bucks working for my boyfriend's tutoring and copyediting business, but this will not pay the rent. Well, I have all weekend to think about it, but I feel like I've already fully exposed myself and the only thing to do is quit, otherwise I fear the head boss bitch will just a find a way to get rid of me somehow...

I guess I should explain (all names changed to protect fools): The agency, Hypocrisy and Religion, I work for has a computerized clock-in system. This was instituted about a year or so ago and has been making my work even more shitty ever since. I don't take well to be treated overtly differently than my coworkers. I prefer to work someplace where my work, rather than the time it takes for me to do it, is valued. Salaried people are paid to go above and beyond and, yet, they get to come in whenever they want and take 90 minute lunches, they don't have to be as accountable as I have to be and I don't like it. I know I've been an underling pretty much my whole career, but I've never felt that way...I'm not sure if I'm explaining myself well, but I just took what I feel was coming to me. I am this way and it's never been a problem. I simply can't have this kind of work system imposed on me. I can't feel chained to a desk, devoid of natural light, my every little second watched...anyway, I think I should stop bitching and start looking for a new job on the real because I think the conclusion is to quit and let the chips fall where they may, no?

If anyone actually read this, thanks, you are a true friend and fan. Gotta get cracking...

Get Well Soon Morgan Freeman!!!

Did you hear this? Morgan Freeman was in a car accident last night near his home in Tennessee and is in serious condition!!! Here's the dish from MSN:

Morgan Freeman in serious condition after car crash
Aug. 4, 2008, 12:40 PM EST

Oscar-winning actor Morgan Freeman was injured in a car accident late Sunday night and is in a hospital in Memphis, Tenn.

Regional Medical Center spokeswoman Kathy Stringer said Freeman, 71, is in serious condition. The hospital is about 90 miles north of the accident scene in rural Tallahatchie County in the Mississippi Delta.

Mississippi Highway Patrol spokesman Sgt. Ben Williams confirmed Freeman was in a wreck shortly before midnight Sunday, but said he was still gathering information and had few details Monday.

Clay McFerrin, editor of Sun Sentinel in Charleston, said he arrived at the accident scene on Mississippi Highway 32 soon after it happened about 4 miles west of Charleston, not far from where Freeman owns a home with his wife.

McFerrin said it appeared that Freeman's car was airborne when it left the highway and landed in a ditch.

"They had to use the jaws of life to extract him from the vehicle," McFerrin said. "He was lucid, conscious. He was talking, joking with some of the rescue workers at one point."

McFerrin said bystanders converged on the scene trying to get a glimpse of the actor.

When one person tried to snap a photo with a cell phone camera, Freeman joked, "no freebies, no freebies," McFerrin said.

The hospital where Freeman is being treated is commonly known as The Med, and is an acute-care teaching facility that serves patients within 150 miles of Memphis.


I hope he makes a speedy recovery, otherwise who will play the ol' wise characters that we love him for? Someone's gotta drive Miss Daisy!

I love this video

heartsrevolution "C.Y.O.A." (Choose Your Own Adventure)

Thanks to my Bust subscription, I can keep abreast of the coolest indie shit. It's great! I love you Busty Betches!

Check out the top of my music playlist for the latest shit I'm listening to.

Tonight I want to use the word "shit" a lot (i guess) because shit gets hectic and you need to be getting your shit in order. Whatevs. I'm stupid.

Congratulations Mayor Newsom!

When we last saw our handsome mayor, Gavin Newsom, and his purty actress then-fiancee-now-wife, Jennifer Siebel, they were giving the ol' terrorist fist jab and Nazi salutes to the crowd at SF's LGBT Pride Parade. Yesterday, they tied the knot on Siebel's parents' Montana ranch...and the news made MSN! Go Gavin!

Here's a link to the article:
1=28103">http://tv.msn.com/tv/article.aspx/?news=324659>1=28103

Oh Gavin, I never knew a mayorship could be like this! He's young, interesting, and ambitious. He usually wears his hair in an ugly bullet haircut, but I prefer it when he lets his shiny locks go au natural...like in this pic

(sigh...just let your Soul-Glo Gavin, just let your soooouullll glooooooo)

Anyway, I hope he is happier in this marriage than his last (http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2005/01/06/MANDR.TMP)

here's the happy couple (and his awful bullet hairstyle)

Santogold for Sale

I like Santogold's music and style. I am also keenly aware of the "Everybody's-Gotta-Get-Paid" mantra, but damn girl were you having a two-for-one sale on your songs? Is it just me or has her shit endorsed damn near everything? Here are two I could find...

she's down with Ford


and Bud...



Her "Lights Out" song is endorsing something too. Anyway, I'm not really hating on Santogold. Like I said I enjoy her music and think she's cute, but she's also, obviously, for sale and that is a wee affront to my indie-ass. That's all I'm saying.

Here as a veritable olive branch her "L.E.S. Artistes" video - starring a beautiful black horse and funky colored guts. I was smitten at first site. Her shit is tight. She's from Brooklyn and has a great haircut. Go earn your cheddar...(i guess)

Thank You for Being a Friend: RIP Estelle Getty

Estelle Getty died Tuesday, July 22 at the age of 84 of severe dementia. If ya don't know, Estelle Getty played Sofia on The Golden Girls, a great long-running US TV show (ran from late '80s to mid '90s). Sofia was the cantankerous loving ol Sicilian who loved to give Dorothy shit. I loved her! She was the funniest character on that show, if you ask me. She also had an interesting life. She was very committed to her craft and her story makes me think of how obsessed with youth our culture is...basically once an actress starts showing wrinkles that's pretty much the end of her career. Yet men can be the "older suave gentleman" (i.e., Sean Connery, Harrison Ford - isn't he like 90?)...whatevs. Women are not yet men's equal, at least not in the entertainment industry.

Enough of this idle pandering, check out the article CNN did on her. She was an actress fo' life!

http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/TV/07/22/estelle.getty.obit/index.html

Here are a couple of sweet Sofia clips I was able to rassle up


The quality on this one stinks since it's simply someone recording their TV, but it's so dead on Sofia!


short, sweet and simple




My sisters and I would sing along to the theme song and you can too!!! Rest in Peace, Estelle Getty and thanks for the laughs :)

Man Crush: James Franco

James Franco is fucking hot!



He even looks hot as a total stoner in the new upcoming flix he's in "The Pineapple Express." It looks pretty damn funny. I'm looking forward to checking it out. Here's the trailer:


Looks like him and Rosie Perez character get into a fight! Aww shit! Anyway, I guess I don't really have anything poignant to say, except that...






That's hot.

Wooly Meat

Isn't this freaking cool?


It is yarn-tastic art by Sarah Illenberger. Don't know much about her, except that she is based in Berlin and makes cool art! Here's her "Happy Birthday Internet"


Check out her website: www.sarahillenberger.com

I Love Marc Jacobs?

Last night, I saw the "Marc Jacobs and Louis Vuitton" documentary (by Loic Prigent) and I think I'm in love! ...

Chil'!!! Muy caliente! I'm pretty sure he's gay, but who cares? These matters have never affected my celeb crushes!!!


Anyway, enough Tiger-Beat-reminiscing, not only is Marc Jacobs totally hot, but he's totally an artist. I mean, he absorbs shit like a sponge and he also seems to have fantastic people working for/with him. He is a wunderkund. If you haven't seen the documentary yet I highly recommend it. It's tongue-in-cheek (Sundance Channel describes it as "a witty portrait") and lovingly told. The director is French and the humor is very French. I LOVE it! Marc Jacobs has a great sense of humor and doesn't seem to take himself seriously. He doesn't really own real estate, but rather invests all his money into his art collection, which he guards with a privacy that you have to respect.

Being political about every fucking thing, I couldn't help but want to ask him about his manufacturing practices. I mean, in the doc you see his lead team of seamstress' who do his show work, but you know those betches ain't sewing Marc by Marc Jacobs shit (and lemme tell you, much as I sweat him, that line had some atrocious shiny faux-patent leather quilted bags that SCREAMED child labor a month or so ago!) I mean no harm. I admit I could be wrong, but...

Anywho, what the doc made plainly clear is that, "It's only faaaassshion, it's only fashion!" Just like Santino Rice sings here in a Project Runway Season Two Musical (he's another example of a supposedly gay man - bi? - man who I kinda crushed on for a minute, I heart Santino)

That's right! You sing it Santino! It is only fashion. I love fashion that doesn't take itself too seriously (shot out to Heatherette!)

I love those betches, Richie Rich, Travis and Amanda Lepore (you know the world's #1 transsexual - i don't think she designs but she is definitely an inspiration to them. When I used to hit the clubs (ahhhh, Twilo, the Tunnel circa mid-1990s), I always knew the party was getting started when Amanda would show her tits.)


AnyWHO, back to Marc Jacobs. I own a Marc Jacobs tee-shirt. That's about it. Apparently, he doesn't "do" my size, wazzz up wit' dat? Why the hate? I'd like some super-cute-ironic dress too! Goddamit, a bity part of my just wants the fucking panache!!! Let's check out some of his signature looks...

here's some looks from summer '07


Oh, look at this! (Geez Louise that model's forehead is ridiculous, give a betch some bangs! Cute jacket tho...)


I always think of delicious round-toe shoes when I think of Marc (fuck the pointy toe. i ain't no wicked witch of the west!)


Shoes. Shoes. Oh My God, shoes.

Western Spaghetti by Pes

I saw the 4th annual Animation Show this weekend. This was one of the shorts. I LOVE Pes! Enjoy

Delusions of Derby

Last night I went to my first Roller Derby event. And lemme tell you: Chicks are kickin ass and taking names! I had loads of fun and, of course, have the morning after obsession and delusions of derby grandeur of my own...

Go to http://www.bayareaderbygirls.com/ and check it out. You know I'm all about girl power and was in a lil skate gang myself when I was all of 13 yrs old (ok, so it was in-line, but we're taking early '90s here people give a betch a break!)

Maybe I'll pick up a pair of four-wheels and see if I can hang with the thick gals. Most of them were built like a Robert Crumb fantasy. I have that going for me!


I've spent a good part of the morning trying to think of a cool name. Well, here's what's super-duper-cool: the San Francisco team is called "SF ShEvil Dead," and they are derby's undead! I love zombies and I used to be passionate about skating....hmmm, I'll keep you updated, could be another one of my passing fancies like wanting to be a midwife or famous drummer...I coulda been a contenda!


If you look at some past posts, you'll see that I fucking love Barbie. Well, I've got a new website for you Barbie fans or nemesis of Barbie: it's http://www.alteredbarbie.com/ There will be an altered Barbie art show in SF 'round the beginning of August (a la Tim Gunn, "Just go to the website!"). If you liked making zombie and mutant Barbies when you were young than chances are you'll dig Altered Barbie.

OMG, here's a fuckng totally-rad-awesome-fantastic pic I found of 1950's derby. Girl power!!


Kick ass.

Pier One Imports Horror

Yesterday I couldn't deal with "normal" life, so I escaped the mental illness-stewing flourescent fuck-bubble of an environment that I unfortunately occupy daily (my cubicle - depressed much?). Work has been slow lately and I am mentally done with it. Never a good combination. Anyway, I'm 30 and hate my job, join the fucking club, right Lewd Betches?

So, what does any super high depressed, PMSy lady do with an afternoon off? Why visit my local Salvation Army thrift store and Pier One Imports, of course!?


Okay, so that's not that scary, but what lies inside? Ugh. I must admit I'm not a frequent Home Decor shopper, or any kind of shopper (I'm an online shopper and I don't care for clothes shopping) for that matter. I had NO FUCKING IDEA what kind of bullshit they were hoarding there. Everything in there was like an imitation of something great (i.e., real potted plants = shiny plastic faux-flower vases; high quality artisan goods for kitchen/bathroom = tacky made-in-China crap that already looks like it's falling apart...)

Look, I don't mean to hate on fools that enjoy that kind of stuff. Lord knows I used to love a deal regardless of the quality of goods!

Here's my deal: I am sensitive to this world, especially chemicals and unnatural colors (unless it's neon!). The super-sweet smell of the candle area was nauseating and I think EVERYTHING in there was Made in China. I didn't need my eyes to tell me that I was somewhere toxic, I could smell it! For what it's worth, I think they are going out of business. YAY!

I urge all of you out there to go green. Be conscious. Find the green cause that affects you. I am slowly trying to integrate all-natural bath and body and eventually household cleaning products. I am also going to start an herb garden and see if I have any kind of green thumb.

I don't know if I've adequately expressed the Pier One horror. Obviously, I wanted to get the hell out of there asap. I left and saw a bus waiting at a red light on the corner. I ran and tapped on the door. The cunt-of-a-driver looks me straight in the eyes and shakes her head no. The bus remained at the light for a good couple minutes after that and then drove off. WTF?! I was in such a state that I cried. I hate mean cunts. She was ugly too. That's probably why she didn't let me on. I don't understand...see, this is what I mean by "sensitive." If I were a teen and that had happened, I would have kicked and spit. I spit on a bus driver once when I was 16 or so. I was a bad ass or an idiot, depending on your POV.


Oi!

Waiting for Bruno

YAY! Sacha Baron Cohen is working on a film based on his Bruno character from the Ali G Show. Bruno is a fabulous queer Austrian fashionista. Here's Bruno talking with "Der Gay Converter" Should be a great movie, I can't wait. Go to YouTube for more funny clips, including Bruno and the Neo Nazis and Bruno Goes to a Christian Rock Festival...


Hmmm, "eating chocolate as part of a homosexual lifestyle?" Well, cover me in some chocolate salty balls and call me Mary!!!


P.S. I think Sacha Baron Cohen is HOT! And enjoyed the naked Borat scene because I saw a tall lanky hot nekkid man rolling around with some fat hairy-assed faux-Kazak. That's hot.

Girlie Crush: Mia Doi Todd

A couple months ago I came across a couple Mia Doi Todd tracks, mostly remixes. Her voice is beautiful and haunting and SHE is beautiful and haunting...it's the kind of music to make love, grieve, give birth, smile and cry. I fucking love her!


Here are a couple of my fave videos and songs of hers:

Deep at Sea (given my raverlicious past really love this video. her makeup is great and so is her outfit, go girl! i think this is her 'older' stuff maybe - don't quote me on that)


My Room is White (I think this is her more recent work. I LOVE this song. She is a great songwriter, Geez Louise girl!)


Okay, so this is Dntel featuring Mia Doi Todd "Rock My Boat" This video is freaking cool man, WATCH IT. This is also the song that introduced me to her :)


Man, I want to keep going, but I have to get to work and am being booted off by the ol' ball and chain

"Night of a Thousand Kisses" (a love her hair!)

Our Friendly Neighbors Up North

HAPPY CANADA DAY!

I'm not Canadian, but boy do I love our neighbors up north! Some of my fave comedians come from there, like

David Cross

Kenny Hotz (of Kenny vs. Spenny, I guess Spenny's aiiight)


Kids in the Hall!


Canadians also care for each other, as their health care for all system attests. They also have like less violence and stuff.

Softer Marijuana laws (this photo came up when I searched for photos of violent Canadians!)


Vancouver

If you haven't been to Vancouver, I highly recommend it. It's a beautiful, fun city with lots of green and good shopping.

Montreal

If Vancouver and Montreal had a battle, I can't say for sure who would win, but I LOVE Montreal! I've never been there in winter and I don't think I'd recommend that, but man, Montreal in spring is great! The food is good, people are chill, the vibe of the city is just so cool. And they have delicious bagels!!! Smaller than NYC and more light and fluffy, AY!

Canada also has beautiful wilderness. Now, I've never been camping out there, but it is WILD country up there! I want to go do this up in Canada...(sigh)

And, of course no tribute to Canada would be complete without bowing down to Canada's greatest export...


Followed closely by...


HOT DAMN!!!


I LOVE you damn Canadians! Les Canadiens, je vous aime !

Nazis for Gay Pride

Here's the Mayor of San Francisco, Gavin Newsom, and his fiancee Jennifer Siebel "saluting" the crowd at the 38th annual SF LGBT Pride Parade. Who knew he was into Nazis? And so nice to see him adopting Michelle Obama's famous "terrorist fist jab!"

Amy Winehouse: Hot Junkie Mess

Since I use my blog to listen to my cool tunes now, I couldn't stand the tits staring out from me first thing...I mean, they are cute tits, but here's the thing: Miss Lewd Lavolita is torn between being as fucking lewd as possible and fronting as a classy lady, but really I'm a Hamburger-Helper-raised, spit-on-the-streets-raised and so sometimes there is conflict (agita if you will)

Whateves. I ain't no punk-ass psychologist, but I play one on the blogosphere. Here's Amy Winehouse at the Glastonbury Fair '08...my analysis is "She's totally cracked out and I think the fan may have been some kind of freak that was into that kinda thing. I mean the girl weighs what 60 pounds?! Her face doesn't look particularly pissed off....eh, the bitch is CRAZY! Enjoy!

Summertime Boobs and Other Fun Stuff

Yesterday I went to the Dyke March in SF and lemme tell you: Dykes this year like to show their boobs more than last year! Here's a pair of SF Boobs (a la Dave Chappelle's great "NY Boobs" skit!)


There were parts that felt like Mardi Gras, seriously. With beads being thrown for boobs shown, it's cool. I'm down with women liberating their tits and all, but I am definitely more modest.

Anyway, I had fun yesterday, got lifted, hung out with some pals, marched and then ate some yummy Indian food...I had to walk home though!!! I walked like mad yesterday! The buses were all delayed and shit...for those who know SF: The march was in Dolores Park, it marched down from there to Guerrero and then back up 16th street to Market & Castro. Then, after dinner, I had to walk from the resto (nr Castro Mkt) all the way to my house near Divisadero and Sutter!!! Mad trek. I take it easy today.

So, I also want to post something for all the kiddies! Here is a list of other fun shit you can do in the summer:

1) Play Tennis!


2) Visit your local beach/lake/pond/water spot.


3) Drink Beer OUTSIDE!


This is some random ass pic I found online of one in Astoria Queen NYCers!

4) Take a fucking hike


5) Vacate.


Alternately, you can do what I'm doing...


HAVE A GREAT SUMMER FELLOW BLOG SLUTS