Lewd Lavolita

If You Happen to be around...

2008-11-23T17:03:00.000-08:00

Damn, it's been a while! Here are a couple of trailers for some cool films I've seen lately (I guess to make up for lost blogging):

I saw Slumdog Millionaire last night. Here's the trailer (though I think it hardly serves the movie justice, it was a fantastic film!) It's essentially a romance too which I (heart)

Here's the trailer for Fears of the Dark A B&W animated visual orgasm, spooky scary

I'm looking forward to seeing Waltz with Bashir, an animated Lebanese film and animated in a kick-ass style, aw hell, here's the trailer!

Uh! I can't wait! :)

So here's the big news everyone or anyone who managed to get through all of those previews (lol), here's the main fucking attraction if you will...I will not smoke weed in 2009. For me that is a HUGE statement considering the amount and frequency with which I smoke. I am even hoping I will make it. I mean say what you will haters, but there is such a thing as pyschological addiction to marijuana and the mind is a powerful thing. It's my coping mechanism. It is how I relax. I am irritable without it and anytime I've gone a few days (can't remember last time I've gone longer than a week stoned) sober I would experience difficulty sleeping, strange-ass dreams, funky night sweats and the fucking bitch fest of a lifetime! Hooray!

I shouldn't joke about such serious matters. Anyway I'm going to go bake some bread. For real. A Sesame Pumpkin quick Bread!

peas.

Employed at Last!

2008-09-29T08:06:00.000-07:00

I start my new job tomorrow and can't wait. While I have enjoyed this brief sojourn from employment, I am ready for this job, which is kinda dreamy. I'm going to be working for a prestigious art institute here in San Francisco in a management capacity. I will be surrounded by artists, intellectuals and the fresh energy that students bring. I can't freaking wait!

So there you have it. Proof positive that one can go from calling your boss a racist to the job of one's dreams at an organization so very fucking different than the one I was working for before. I'm so happy!

Shoe Therapy

2008-09-10T14:21:00.000-07:00

I'm not of the retail therapy type usually, but boy oh boy, do I love me some Ross!!! I went in to get a pair of shoes and came out with a couple, all for about $35. I thought it was a steal and I have such cute shoes betch!!!!

Here's an oldie but goodie for ol' times sake...

Anyway, I had a good reason for buying shoes. I am going to a wedding this wknd and needed a cute pair and boy did I get 'em...two of them :)

I am living on borrowed time here and every minute that my phone doesn't ring is that much more cause for anxiety...the days of splurging on two pairs of shoes will soon come to an end. I am only on day three of unemployment and lemme tell ya...it sucks! I like being busy and I am so hungry for a job in higher ed. PLEASE I hope I find one! Enough of my sniveling...it's all about the shoes betch! And remember...

JUST SAY NO TO POINTY TOE...unless you're the Wicked Witch!

Women's Power! Vagina Power!

2008-09-02T07:26:00.001-07:00

For the past few months, I've been reading and watching films about birth, particularly modern maternity care in the US and natural birth. The movie that started it all was Ricki Lake and Abby Epstein's "The Business of Being Born" (2007) Go Ricki! Go Ricki!

Here's the trailer, it's amazing!

I must preface this all with,
1) I've never given birth or carried a pregnancy to term.
and
2) because of that I realize that until I have a child of my own, I can never fully understand the magnitude of childbirth. I feel it's like the woman said at the end of the trailer, "Nothing compares to the privilege of giving life and the responsibility of that." That is something I hold true in my heart...I mean to make a life that's a fucking trip and might as well ride the trip until the end...what's crazy is that, after reading up and all, you wonder, "Why is the United States doing things so differently than other countries?" Our births are overmedicalized. How can you labor if you aren't even allowed to move around? Or feel your legs after an epidural for that matter? The whole thing seems very counter-intuitive to me. Besides after witnessing some amazing natural/home births, it's awe-inspiring and beautiful to see women at their most powerful in a way...(this is not to say that birth defines woman, far from it, merely to point at the natural beauty and empowerment of that process)

Anyway, I gotta get to work...I can't wait to have a baby to experience it for myself. Actually, I can wait, let's give it a few years! Maybe I should find a job first!

This is my last week at the ole' cave and I am happy about it. I have two interviews at higher education institutions Thurs and Fri morns. Wish me luck everybody. I hope I knock 'em dead. I have to remember though that this is a long process and to not waste all my best shit on the first interview...

Gotta motor. Peas and Carrots. Der.

P.S. I just found the pic above online, lemme know if it's like some nazi women power shit or i dunno what...

Maria Callas and Other Just Because Downloads

2008-08-31T11:23:00.000-07:00

has a beautiful voice and a beautiful face.

I am listening to her sing "Ave Maria," so very lovely.

I spent the morning downloading some tunes. Here's what I'm digging this morn':

Johnny Cash (I didn't download anything new, but I'm feeling very Johnny Cash-ish myself these days.

I'm still having after-glow from Obama's DNC speech. Did you catch Stevie Wonder on before? It was great! I downloaded a bunch of Stevie like "Superstition," "Overjoyed," "Part Time Lover," and "She's a Bad Mamma Jamma," among others. Man, I am SO EXCITED FOR OBAMA TO BE PRESIDENT ALREADY!!!! He HAS to win. McCain was trying to steal some of Obama's fire this week by announcing Sarah Palin as his running mate. Whatever. Fuck Sarah Palin. I am staunchly pro-choice and I hate how it's actually a boon to conserative rw christians that she carried a child w/ Down's Syndrome to term after a amniocentisis...

She is kinda cute though. See www.fish-scale.blogspot.com

Anyway, Stevie rules! Obama rules!

Let me find out Stevie was kinda a papi chuelo back in the day...

Anyway, what started the dowloading frenzy of the day was a desire to her "Last Dance" by Tom Petty.

It's a great song, along with "Roll Another Joint," "Refugee," and "Zombie Zoo." Tom Petty, I no want to petty.

Enjoy your holiday all!

OMG: Did I just do THAT?!

2008-08-15T14:47:00.000-07:00

Today I called my boss a racist. I'm not sorry for it in the true sense (meaning, I simply said what I felt to be true), but I am sorry in the adult "gotta-suck-ass-to-get-ahead" kinda way. I'm kicking myself because I know it was a dumb thing to do, but part of me feels like I've lived out some fantasy...AND IT FEELS FUCKING GREAT! Imagine actually telling your boss the most fuck-uped shit you thought of them...makes you smile like a Cheshire Cat, right?

Anyway, it is not so good for my career that there move, but this is not the career I want to be in anyway...ay, what the fuck am I going to do? BTW, this post is by me for me. Usually I have the wherewithal to try and be witty, but this shit stinks. I basically quit and then asked fools if I could think about it over the weekend. I really want to quit. I mean, I am so fucking unhappy there. I can't stand being in that lightless box working for a Catholic organization and all that entails, FUCK THAT! It's not for me! But how am I going to pay my rent? I'll just have to find another job promto and that means I am more apt to take something I don't really care for...I dunno. I know what I instintually want to do: quit. Now, where do I go from there? I can make some meagre bucks working for my boyfriend's tutoring and copyediting business, but this will not pay the rent. Well, I have all weekend to think about it, but I feel like I've already fully exposed myself and the only thing to do is quit, otherwise I fear the head boss bitch will just a find a way to get rid of me somehow...

I guess I should explain (all names changed to protect fools): The agency, Hypocrisy and Religion, I work for has a computerized clock-in system. This was instituted about a year or so ago and has been making my work even more shitty ever since. I don't take well to be treated overtly differently than my coworkers. I prefer to work someplace where my work, rather than the time it takes for me to do it, is valued. Salaried people are paid to go above and beyond and, yet, they get to come in whenever they want and take 90 minute lunches, they don't have to be as accountable as I have to be and I don't like it. I know I've been an underling pretty much my whole career, but I've never felt that way...I'm not sure if I'm explaining myself well, but I just took what I feel was coming to me. I am this way and it's never been a problem. I simply can't have this kind of work system imposed on me. I can't feel chained to a desk, devoid of natural light, my every little second watched...anyway, I think I should stop bitching and start looking for a new job on the real because I think the conclusion is to quit and let the chips fall where they may, no?

If anyone actually read this, thanks, you are a true friend and fan. Gotta get cracking...

Get Well Soon Morgan Freeman!!!

2008-08-04T10:43:00.000-07:00

Did you hear this? Morgan Freeman was in a car accident last night near his home in Tennessee and is in serious condition!!! Here's the dish from MSN:

Morgan Freeman in serious condition after car crash
Aug. 4, 2008, 12:40 PM EST

Oscar-winning actor Morgan Freeman was injured in a car accident late Sunday night and is in a hospital in Memphis, Tenn.

Regional Medical Center spokeswoman Kathy Stringer said Freeman, 71, is in serious condition. The hospital is about 90 miles north of the accident scene in rural Tallahatchie County in the Mississippi Delta.

Mississippi Highway Patrol spokesman Sgt. Ben Williams confirmed Freeman was in a wreck shortly before midnight Sunday, but said he was still gathering information and had few details Monday.

Clay McFerrin, editor of Sun Sentinel in Charleston, said he arrived at the accident scene on Mississippi Highway 32 soon after it happened about 4 miles west of Charleston, not far from where Freeman owns a home with his wife.

McFerrin said it appeared that Freeman's car was airborne when it left the highway and landed in a ditch.

"They had to use the jaws of life to extract him from the vehicle," McFerrin said. "He was lucid, conscious. He was talking, joking with some of the rescue workers at one point."

McFerrin said bystanders converged on the scene trying to get a glimpse of the actor.

When one person tried to snap a photo with a cell phone camera, Freeman joked, "no freebies, no freebies," McFerrin said.

The hospital where Freeman is being treated is commonly known as The Med, and is an acute-care teaching facility that serves patients within 150 miles of Memphis.

I hope he makes a speedy recovery, otherwise who will play the ol' wise characters that we love him for? Someone's gotta drive Miss Daisy!

I love this video

2008-07-29T18:43:00.000-07:00

heartsrevolution "C.Y.O.A." (Choose Your Own Adventure)

Thanks to my Bust subscription, I can keep abreast of the coolest indie shit. It's great! I love you Busty Betches!

Check out the top of my music playlist for the latest shit I'm listening to.

Tonight I want to use the word "shit" a lot (i guess) because shit gets hectic and you need to be getting your shit in order. Whatevs. I'm stupid.

Congratulations Mayor Newsom!

2008-07-28T08:10:00.000-07:00

When we last saw our handsome mayor, Gavin Newsom, and his purty actress then-fiancee-now-wife, Jennifer Siebel, they were giving the ol' terrorist fist jab and Nazi salutes to the crowd at SF's LGBT Pride Parade. Yesterday, they tied the knot on Siebel's parents' Montana ranch...and the news made MSN! Go Gavin!

Here's a link to the article:
1=28103">http://tv.msn.com/tv/article.aspx/?news=324659>1=28103

Oh Gavin, I never knew a mayorship could be like this! He's young, interesting, and ambitious. He usually wears his hair in an ugly bullet haircut, but I prefer it when he lets his shiny locks go au natural...like in this pic

(sigh...just let your Soul-Glo Gavin, just let your soooouullll glooooooo)

Anyway, I hope he is happier in this marriage than his last (http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2005/01/06/MANDR.TMP)

here's the happy couple (and his awful bullet hairstyle)

Santogold for Sale

2008-07-25T19:33:00.000-07:00

I like Santogold's music and style. I am also keenly aware of the "Everybody's-Gotta-Get-Paid" mantra, but damn girl were you having a two-for-one sale on your songs? Is it just me or has her shit endorsed damn near everything? Here are two I could find...

she's down with Ford

and Bud...

Her "Lights Out" song is endorsing something too. Anyway, I'm not really hating on Santogold. Like I said I enjoy her music and think she's cute, but she's also, obviously, for sale and that is a wee affront to my indie-ass. That's all I'm saying.

Here as a veritable olive branch her "L.E.S. Artistes" video - starring a beautiful black horse and funky colored guts. I was smitten at first site. Her shit is tight. She's from Brooklyn and has a great haircut. Go earn your cheddar...(i guess)

Thank You for Being a Friend: RIP Estelle Getty

2008-07-24T07:43:00.001-07:00

Estelle Getty died Tuesday, July 22 at the age of 84 of severe dementia. If ya don't know, Estelle Getty played Sofia on The Golden Girls, a great long-running US TV show (ran from late '80s to mid '90s). Sofia was the cantankerous loving ol Sicilian who loved to give Dorothy shit. I loved her! She was the funniest character on that show, if you ask me. She also had an interesting life. She was very committed to her craft and her story makes me think of how obsessed with youth our culture is...basically once an actress starts showing wrinkles that's pretty much the end of her career. Yet men can be the "older suave gentleman" (i.e., Sean Connery, Harrison Ford - isn't he like 90?)...whatevs. Women are not yet men's equal, at least not in the entertainment industry.

Enough of this idle pandering, check out the article CNN did on her. She was an actress fo' life!

http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/TV/07/22/estelle.getty.obit/index.html

Here are a couple of sweet Sofia clips I was able to rassle up

The quality on this one stinks since it's simply someone recording their TV, but it's so dead on Sofia!

short, sweet and simple

My sisters and I would sing along to the theme song and you can too!!! Rest in Peace, Estelle Getty and thanks for the laughs :)

Man Crush: James Franco

2008-07-21T08:21:00.000-07:00

James Franco is fucking hot!

He even looks hot as a total stoner in the new upcoming flix he's in "The Pineapple Express." It looks pretty damn funny. I'm looking forward to checking it out. Here's the trailer:

Looks like him and Rosie Perez character get into a fight! Aww shit! Anyway, I guess I don't really have anything poignant to say, except that...

That's hot.

Wooly Meat

2008-07-16T10:44:00.000-07:00

Isn't this freaking cool?

It is yarn-tastic art by Sarah Illenberger. Don't know much about her, except that she is based in Berlin and makes cool art! Here's her "Happy Birthday Internet"

Check out her website: www.sarahillenberger.com

I Love Marc Jacobs?

2008-07-15T18:26:00.000-07:00

Last night, I saw the "Marc Jacobs and Louis Vuitton" documentary (by Loic Prigent) and I think I'm in love! ...

Chil'!!! Muy caliente! I'm pretty sure he's gay, but who cares? These matters have never affected my celeb crushes!!!

Anyway, enough Tiger-Beat-reminiscing, not only is Marc Jacobs totally hot, but he's totally an artist. I mean, he absorbs shit like a sponge and he also seems to have fantastic people working for/with him. He is a wunderkund. If you haven't seen the documentary yet I highly recommend it. It's tongue-in-cheek (Sundance Channel describes it as "a witty portrait") and lovingly told. The director is French and the humor is very French. I LOVE it! Marc Jacobs has a great sense of humor and doesn't seem to take himself seriously. He doesn't really own real estate, but rather invests all his money into his art collection, which he guards with a privacy that you have to respect.

Being political about every fucking thing, I couldn't help but want to ask him about his manufacturing practices. I mean, in the doc you see his lead team of seamstress' who do his show work, but you know those betches ain't sewing Marc by Marc Jacobs shit (and lemme tell you, much as I sweat him, that line had some atrocious shiny faux-patent leather quilted bags that SCREAMED child labor a month or so ago!) I mean no harm. I admit I could be wrong, but...

Anywho, what the doc made plainly clear is that, "It's only faaaassshion, it's only fashion!" Just like Santino Rice sings here in a Project Runway Season Two Musical (he's another example of a supposedly gay man - bi? - man who I kinda crushed on for a minute, I heart Santino)

That's right! You sing it Santino! It is only fashion. I love fashion that doesn't take itself too seriously (shot out to Heatherette!)

I love those betches, Richie Rich, Travis and Amanda Lepore (you know the world's #1 transsexual - i don't think she designs but she is definitely an inspiration to them. When I used to hit the clubs (ahhhh, Twilo, the Tunnel circa mid-1990s), I always knew the party was getting started when Amanda would show her tits.)

AnyWHO, back to Marc Jacobs. I own a Marc Jacobs tee-shirt. That's about it. Apparently, he doesn't "do" my size, wazzz up wit' dat? Why the hate? I'd like some super-cute-ironic dress too! Goddamit, a bity part of my just wants the fucking panache!!! Let's check out some of his signature looks...

here's some looks from summer '07

Oh, look at this! (Geez Louise that model's forehead is ridiculous, give a betch some bangs! Cute jacket tho...)

I always think of delicious round-toe shoes when I think of Marc (fuck the pointy toe. i ain't no wicked witch of the west!)

Shoes. Shoes. Oh My God, shoes.

Western Spaghetti by Pes

2008-07-14T08:25:00.000-07:00

I saw the 4th annual Animation Show this weekend. This was one of the shorts. I LOVE Pes! Enjoy

Delusions of Derby

2008-07-13T09:27:00.000-07:00

Last night I went to my first Roller Derby event. And lemme tell you: Chicks are kickin ass and taking names! I had loads of fun and, of course, have the morning after obsession and delusions of derby grandeur of my own...

Go to http://www.bayareaderbygirls.com/ and check it out. You know I'm all about girl power and was in a lil skate gang myself when I was all of 13 yrs old (ok, so it was in-line, but we're taking early '90s here people give a betch a break!)

Maybe I'll pick up a pair of four-wheels and see if I can hang with the thick gals. Most of them were built like a Robert Crumb fantasy. I have that going for me!

I've spent a good part of the morning trying to think of a cool name. Well, here's what's super-duper-cool: the San Francisco team is called "SF ShEvil Dead," and they are derby's undead! I love zombies and I used to be passionate about skating....hmmm, I'll keep you updated, could be another one of my passing fancies like wanting to be a midwife or famous drummer...I coulda been a contenda!

If you look at some past posts, you'll see that I fucking love Barbie. Well, I've got a new website for you Barbie fans or nemesis of Barbie: it's http://www.alteredbarbie.com/ There will be an altered Barbie art show in SF 'round the beginning of August (a la Tim Gunn, "Just go to the website!"). If you liked making zombie and mutant Barbies when you were young than chances are you'll dig Altered Barbie.

OMG, here's a fuckng totally-rad-awesome-fantastic pic I found of 1950's derby. Girl power!!

Kick ass.

Pier One Imports Horror

2008-07-11T07:53:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I couldn't deal with "normal" life, so I escaped the mental illness-stewing flourescent fuck-bubble of an environment that I unfortunately occupy daily (my cubicle - depressed much?). Work has been slow lately and I am mentally done with it. Never a good combination. Anyway, I'm 30 and hate my job, join the fucking club, right Lewd Betches?

So, what does any super high depressed, PMSy lady do with an afternoon off? Why visit my local Salvation Army thrift store and Pier One Imports, of course!?

Okay, so that's not that scary, but what lies inside? Ugh. I must admit I'm not a frequent Home Decor shopper, or any kind of shopper (I'm an online shopper and I don't care for clothes shopping) for that matter. I had NO FUCKING IDEA what kind of bullshit they were hoarding there. Everything in there was like an imitation of something great (i.e., real potted plants = shiny plastic faux-flower vases; high quality artisan goods for kitchen/bathroom = tacky made-in-China crap that already looks like it's falling apart...)

Look, I don't mean to hate on fools that enjoy that kind of stuff. Lord knows I used to love a deal regardless of the quality of goods!

Here's my deal: I am sensitive to this world, especially chemicals and unnatural colors (unless it's neon!). The super-sweet smell of the candle area was nauseating and I think EVERYTHING in there was Made in China. I didn't need my eyes to tell me that I was somewhere toxic, I could smell it! For what it's worth, I think they are going out of business. YAY!

I urge all of you out there to go green. Be conscious. Find the green cause that affects you. I am slowly trying to integrate all-natural bath and body and eventually household cleaning products. I am also going to start an herb garden and see if I have any kind of green thumb.

I don't know if I've adequately expressed the Pier One horror. Obviously, I wanted to get the hell out of there asap. I left and saw a bus waiting at a red light on the corner. I ran and tapped on the door. The cunt-of-a-driver looks me straight in the eyes and shakes her head no. The bus remained at the light for a good couple minutes after that and then drove off. WTF?! I was in such a state that I cried. I hate mean cunts. She was ugly too. That's probably why she didn't let me on. I don't understand...see, this is what I mean by "sensitive." If I were a teen and that had happened, I would have kicked and spit. I spit on a bus driver once when I was 16 or so. I was a bad ass or an idiot, depending on your POV.

Oi!

Waiting for Bruno

2008-07-10T07:28:00.000-07:00

YAY! Sacha Baron Cohen is working on a film based on his Bruno character from the Ali G Show. Bruno is a fabulous queer Austrian fashionista. Here's Bruno talking with "Der Gay Converter" Should be a great movie, I can't wait. Go to YouTube for more funny clips, including Bruno and the Neo Nazis and Bruno Goes to a Christian Rock Festival...

Hmmm, "eating chocolate as part of a homosexual lifestyle?" Well, cover me in some chocolate salty balls and call me Mary!!!

P.S. I think Sacha Baron Cohen is HOT! And enjoyed the naked Borat scene because I saw a tall lanky hot nekkid man rolling around with some fat hairy-assed faux-Kazak. That's hot.

Girlie Crush: Mia Doi Todd

2008-07-03T08:28:00.000-07:00

A couple months ago I came across a couple Mia Doi Todd tracks, mostly remixes. Her voice is beautiful and haunting and SHE is beautiful and haunting...it's the kind of music to make love, grieve, give birth, smile and cry. I fucking love her!

Here are a couple of my fave videos and songs of hers:

Deep at Sea (given my raverlicious past really love this video. her makeup is great and so is her outfit, go girl! i think this is her 'older' stuff maybe - don't quote me on that)

My Room is White (I think this is her more recent work. I LOVE this song. She is a great songwriter, Geez Louise girl!)

Okay, so this is Dntel featuring Mia Doi Todd "Rock My Boat" This video is freaking cool man, WATCH IT. This is also the song that introduced me to her :)

Man, I want to keep going, but I have to get to work and am being booted off by the ol' ball and chain

"Night of a Thousand Kisses" (a love her hair!)

Our Friendly Neighbors Up North

2008-07-01T07:54:00.000-07:00

HAPPY CANADA DAY!

I'm not Canadian, but boy do I love our neighbors up north! Some of my fave comedians come from there, like

David Cross

Kenny Hotz (of Kenny vs. Spenny, I guess Spenny's aiiight)

Kids in the Hall!

Canadians also care for each other, as their health care for all system attests. They also have like less violence and stuff.

Softer Marijuana laws (this photo came up when I searched for photos of violent Canadians!)

Vancouver

If you haven't been to Vancouver, I highly recommend it. It's a beautiful, fun city with lots of green and good shopping.

Montreal

If Vancouver and Montreal had a battle, I can't say for sure who would win, but I LOVE Montreal! I've never been there in winter and I don't think I'd recommend that, but man, Montreal in spring is great! The food is good, people are chill, the vibe of the city is just so cool. And they have delicious bagels!!! Smaller than NYC and more light and fluffy, AY!

Canada also has beautiful wilderness. Now, I've never been camping out there, but it is WILD country up there! I want to go do this up in Canada...(sigh)

And, of course no tribute to Canada would be complete without bowing down to Canada's greatest export...

Followed closely by...

HOT DAMN!!!

I LOVE you damn Canadians! Les Canadiens, je vous aime !

Nazis for Gay Pride

2008-06-30T09:50:00.001-07:00

Here's the Mayor of San Francisco, Gavin Newsom, and his fiancee Jennifer Siebel "saluting" the crowd at the 38th annual SF LGBT Pride Parade. Who knew he was into Nazis? And so nice to see him adopting Michelle Obama's famous "terrorist fist jab!"

Amy Winehouse: Hot Junkie Mess

2008-06-30T08:15:00.000-07:00

Since I use my blog to listen to my cool tunes now, I couldn't stand the tits staring out from me first thing...I mean, they are cute tits, but here's the thing: Miss Lewd Lavolita is torn between being as fucking lewd as possible and fronting as a classy lady, but really I'm a Hamburger-Helper-raised, spit-on-the-streets-raised and so sometimes there is conflict (agita if you will)

Whateves. I ain't no punk-ass psychologist, but I play one on the blogosphere. Here's Amy Winehouse at the Glastonbury Fair '08...my analysis is "She's totally cracked out and I think the fan may have been some kind of freak that was into that kinda thing. I mean the girl weighs what 60 pounds?! Her face doesn't look particularly pissed off....eh, the bitch is CRAZY! Enjoy!

Summertime Boobs and Other Fun Stuff

2008-06-29T09:29:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went to the Dyke March in SF and lemme tell you: Dykes this year like to show their boobs more than last year! Here's a pair of SF Boobs (a la Dave Chappelle's great "NY Boobs" skit!)

There were parts that felt like Mardi Gras, seriously. With beads being thrown for boobs shown, it's cool. I'm down with women liberating their tits and all, but I am definitely more modest.

Anyway, I had fun yesterday, got lifted, hung out with some pals, marched and then ate some yummy Indian food...I had to walk home though!!! I walked like mad yesterday! The buses were all delayed and shit...for those who know SF: The march was in Dolores Park, it marched down from there to Guerrero and then back up 16th street to Market & Castro. Then, after dinner, I had to walk from the resto (nr Castro Mkt) all the way to my house near Divisadero and Sutter!!! Mad trek. I take it easy today.

So, I also want to post something for all the kiddies! Here is a list of other fun shit you can do in the summer:

1) Play Tennis!

2) Visit your local beach/lake/pond/water spot.

3) Drink Beer OUTSIDE!

This is some random ass pic I found online of one in Astoria Queen NYCers!

4) Take a fucking hike

5) Vacate.

Alternately, you can do what I'm doing...

HAVE A GREAT SUMMER FELLOW BLOG SLUTS

It's Not Easy Going Green

2008-06-27T07:43:00.000-07:00

I'm happily reading Gorgeously Green by Sophie Uliano. It's got the Oprah seal of approval, so you know I'm all over it.

Since moving out West, I've definitely become more granola, but not in the Birkenstocks-I-wanna-look-like-Jesus kind of way, no. My body and mind led me to the decision to make a conscious effort to be more green. If our country wasn't stuck in a two-party system, I would totally join the Green Party. My ethics and morals are more aligned with what that party believes, but I got to vote for Obama!!!

Anyway, I got side-tracked: so I'm reading this book and lemme tell you! Capitalism has led to toxic chemicals being put in every fucking thing!!! Dishwashing liquid, face creams, lotions, soaps, household cleaning products, even....vinyl shower curtains!!! This bitch can make an argument for everything. I am slowly going green though.

I kind of explained above how my mind led me to this place, well here's where it gets super real:

I started getting red, irritated itchy-ass armpits!!! I had contact dermatitis, which is a fancy way for saying "skin irritation most likely called by some toxic chemicals you put on or in your body!!! (eeeewww, there's so many gross pics on google pics of different kinds of contact dermatitis, mine's looked kind of like this - mild, thank goodness!)

I saw a pattern emerge, when I wore deodorant (and I'm talking Tom's of Maine and that Crystal Stick shit, already "natural") my pits would get irritated. Also when I shaved (now I use all natch shave cream and moisty strip razor and it's better) it would get fucked....now I am a lotion and pure cornstarch girl. That's all that goes on my pits and I am liberated!!!

Now that I have slowly begun incorporating eco-friendly products and ways on living in my life, I feel like, "Uh it's not enough!" Whateves. I'm of the world-on-your-shoulders-type.

Alright, gotta head off and start my day...Go Green!!! Do it! Just be conscious of what you consume and ways you can reduce, reuse and recycle! I also really recommend her book, of course.

Oprah and her best friend Gayle

Gym Rat Potheads for Obama

2008-06-25T08:06:00.000-07:00

I have been generally feeling more grateful and peaceful lately. Ever since I came back from NYC, I've been full of positive energy. I've been working out everyday. My new motivating motto:

Work Out or Be Fat - Your Choice

Word. I know it may seem stark and cruel, but this kind of thinking is necessary for me to only miss a workout for a good reason. At least 30 minutes a day of something. I want to be fit and trim (prepare the body years in advance for pregnancy - I am WOMAN hear my ROAR!)

The mind is a whole other story.
Pothead by Bob Dob

Yes, it continues. I can't even say I care too much. It is my one vice. Sue me. I'll shape up when I have to.

I'm doing my best not to put other aspects of my life on hold and this, I am sure, is contributing the the overall feeling of optimism.
That and a little...

Ay ay ay! Future pres and first lady ya'll! Intelligent, beautiful, progressive...ay, I quiver with excitement!!! Vote betches!

Why I Love Barbie

2008-06-24T08:00:00.000-07:00

She is plastic and beautiful.

She comes in different varieties, all the same shape.

Okay so this one is a piece by Andras Kallai. "Fat Barbie." 2006

(I admit maybe Barbie doesn't teach little girls an exactly healthy version of what it means to be a beautiful woman, but my loyalty to Barbie runs deep. Like programmed from birth Catholic-guilt kind of deep. Yeah.)

So back to worshipping Barbie. I used to collect them, but moving around necessited the selling of said dolls. I remember my favorties were Puerto Rican (of course), Chilean, and French CanCan (from like the '80s!)...the following claims to be the first Barbie commercial - Oh boy! "Barbie I want to be you"...

Mod Francie, loves it!

Now I'm just on a roll. Figured I should show something that better represents what I was infiltrated (assimilated?) with...1980s Barbie (the selling of product to children in the '80s was fucking insane!)

Anyway, here's the PR Barbie, miss you girl (as I shed a tear haha...)

One thing I hope the vids have made clear...Dressing Barbie is F-U-N!!! Alright, I admit I used to make Barbie pornos alright. My sisters and I we are all guilty. I'd probably post them if I had them digitally. They are classic.

I was also fond of giving Barbie extreme makeovers (crazy haircuts, tattoos, piercings, amputations, whatever)

And of course you gotta love Redneck Barbie...

And I hope to take a cue from this Barbie in the next five years or so...

When I'm ready to give up this kind of lifestyle maybe

Damn I can go on forever, but even Barbie has to go to work. Peace.

"Their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff"

2008-06-23T14:49:00.000-07:00

RIP George Carlin, you foul-mouthed son-of-a-bitch (1937 - 2008)

George Carlin died yesterday of heart failure. He was one of my favorite (if not my favorite) comedian. I remember watching the following skit when I was a child and loving it. His comedy stands the test of time. Here it is: George Carlin on STUFF

The New York Times did a really nice article on him. Check it out here:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/24/arts/24appr.html?hp

Here he is getting arrested for being a bad-ass in the '70s...

And here he is as he will be remembered (2004)...Cool until the end. Word.

Papaphobia

2008-06-19T14:51:00.000-07:00

Fear of the Pope

Be afraid, be very afraid

Check out this wesbite for a ridiculously long-lists of phobias to choose from! Extra! Extra! Get your neuroses here!

http://www.coolquiz.com/trivia/didyouknow/phobia.asp

Why YOU my bi-brown-gay-asian-dyke-black-native am-tranny-bi/multiracial friend should MOVE TO THE STICKS!

2008-06-18T09:30:00.000-07:00

From the Associated Press today:

Oregon man wins Great American Think-Off

NEW YORK MILLS, MINN. -- An Oregon man is the winner of this year's Great American Think-Off, a national philosophy competition that gives ordinary people the chance to debate some of life's perplexing questions.

This year's question: "Does immigration strengthen or threaten the United States?"

Craig Allen, of West Linn, Ore., won a gold medal Saturday after a live audience in New York Mills decided he was most convincing when arguing that the system of immigration and immigration policy is broken. He says it encourages an influx of illegal immigrants and poses a threat to the country.

During the debate, the four Think-Off finalists touched on what it means to be an American and stressed that American identity is evolving.

The debate is held by the New York Mills Regional Cultural Center, a nonprofit organization dedicated to expanding the cultural and creative opportunities of rural Americans. New York Mills is a farming town of some 1,200 people in central Minnesota, about 170 miles northwest of Minneapolis.

The silver medal winner was Deana Cavaliere from Richfield, Minn., who argued that immigrants of diverse cultures have created a mix of ideas that makes America an innovative and wealthy country.

The other two finalists received bronze medals. Tom Bailey of Nashville, Tenn., argued that immigration strengthens the U.S., and Nick Thayer of St. Cloud, Minn., argued that it threatens the country.
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I went to graduate school at the University of New Hampshire - the second whitest state in the Union! I am apt to tell friends that I didn't truly realize I was "marginal/other" until I moved there. My time there was crazy and boring, filled with interesting experiences, both positive and negative. I experienced racism and a warm open curiosity. One thing is for sure during my time there: I was always looking forward to getting the hell on outta there and back into some city, any city, ASAP! It crossed my mind a few times that NH really needs some browning up (a little queer spice thrown in for good measure wouldn't hurt either, though that community was better represented than Latinos) and maybe I should consider staying. That thought lasted for maybe 1/2 a second. I felt there was nothing there for me; people didn't get me. Okay I'll just say it: It was too white! I need to be where brown people are! I admit it! I need to live in a place where a black midget tranny can walk freely with nary the second glance. This reason is why I am proud to call San Francisco and Brooklyn my homes.

All that said, you may be wondering, "Why the title? Why the urge to my diverse ilk to part ways with the concrete jungle and head on out to Bend, head on out to NH, head on out to New York Mills Minnesota? Because we need to reach our diverse tentacles out into the country...it brings a smile to my face when I hear that immigrants are making communities in smaller US cities (keep it going, keep moving to the center...). I admire those who can make the leap, those who spread their multiculti seeds far and wide. I am aware that a browning does not necessarily directly correspond to a more open diverse community (CA Republican Latino majority case in point?), but, politics aside, it does foster acceptance. I would imagine that most college towns, like UNH, can be diverse lil microcosms, drowning in a sea of blah.

I'm not sure I've made a convincing argument on why you should move to the sticks, but if you have the courage and inclination, DO IT! (Lord knows I won't!)

I love SMARMY AT THE PARTY!

2007-11-06T12:28:00.000-08:00

Check out this cool new blog, much better than my barely-used one

www.fish-scale.blogspot.com

ABOUT ME!

2007-08-31T17:53:00.000-07:00

Yippee! Yay! I left the office early for Labor Day Weekend! So, what did I do? Well, go home and veg out on the computer of course! (robot-voice: Must have 8 hours, must have flourescence at all times)

I am sharting around trying to find a really good "about me" survey for my MySpace page.

I am 29 years old.

Eh, what can I say???? I was looking for a witty way to let people know all "about me!" I write for a living. Shouldn't I be able to tell people about myself, in a way I see fit? Hmmmm...

I like colors, but not on me. I am human, before anything else. I breathe. I think a lot. I don't like violence. I don't like to feel trapped, contained, or otherwise owned. I like peace and love and realness.

I like freshness, but I also take pleasure in funk. I hate beets! I remember drinking coca cola outta a baby bottle. I don't like the color yellow.

I love crude humor and other low rent shit. I like pop culture, low culture, and high culture. I like tea time. Yoga makes me feel GREAT! I don't think I'm racist...but I can be cruel. I am essentially very loving, especially towards family and friends.

I'm a Capricorn, in many different houses, so I am like super Capricorn deluxe!

I am Puerto Rican and proud. Puerto Ricans are the ONLY people with a culture, but no nation...chew on that one...and read Jorge Duany's "The Puerto Rican Nation on the Move" for more on that...

I like androgyny and my sexual history reflects that. I HATE the word bisexual....I see myself as more "lover of humans"...that sounds SO hippy dippy, so be it, it's the 40th Anniversary of Summer of Love bitches! (dork)

Okay, bye!

I (heart) Panera Bread!

2007-07-23T10:49:00.000-07:00

When I was a graduate student in New Hampshire, Panera Bread was THE PLACE for ladies who lunch. My friends and I would hit up this spot at the strip mall right outside of Portsmouth. I think their food is really tasty! If you are lucky enough to have one nearby, check it out! It's not even 11am proper yet and I am already dreaming of lunch.

www.panerabread.com

I feel the earth move under my feet

2007-07-20T09:39:00.000-07:00

Last night, a 4.2 magnitude earthquake hit Oakland. Big whoopdy-do! I woke up briefly: My Mookie and I sat up in bed and "waited" it out. "Waited" is a HUGE overstatement--the very mild shaking was felt for MAYBE 5 seconds. When it stopped, I went to the bathroom and crawled back into bed mumbling something like "little tremblor." Ah, earthquakes are SO FUN!

WHAT?! FUN?! Let me explain: When I moved to the Bay Area, I was all like east coast earthquake pussy. I would think about the possibility of an earthquake and it would totally freak me out. Then, I experienced my first tremblor. I was sitting on the couch knitting and all of a sudden it felt like a huge hiccup--that's the best way I can explain it. I looked at Mook like, "What the hell was that?" And he said, "Earthquake" and told me to stand in the doorway with him, but there were no more tremblors, no after-shocks, just the beating of our hearts together. Mookie told me to remain calm as I felt his heart jumping out of his chest. I was freaked out, yet intrigued. Wow, I thought, I just felt the earth MOVE! It was kinda cool with a dash of salt-and-vinegar fear. I tried to imagine that hiccup more pronounced and thought, "yeah that would suck."

My original east coast fear has dissipated, replaced with a more west coast earthquake blasé. If it don't feel too intense, why even bother getting out of bed? It's just a little shake, rattle, and roll that's all. This leads me to another interesting thing about earthquakes: the first one I felt was like a hiccup, all subsequent quakes have felt more like a shimmy shimmy shake shake side to side--the way I've always imagined quakes to feel like. So the earth moves up and down AND side to side....SHIMMY SHIMMY YA SHIMMY YA SHIMMY YAY!

R.I.P. ODB

Jailbait

2007-07-10T21:13:00.000-07:00

Fafi (brunette) is a cool French graffiti artist. Uffie, besides being French jailbait, is an electro rapper, gross that sounds awful, but her shit is tight. I promise!

Abuse of Power

2007-07-09T16:27:00.000-07:00

I work for a large social service nonprofit here in San Francisco as a grant writer. Recently, my boss left the organization (let's call the organization "Doin Good in da Hood") to pursue bigger dreams. While I am happy for him, I can't say I am surprised he left and went on to "bigger and better things." He is one of those people who truly seem to have it all: smarts, looks, charm, and a seemingly nondysfunctional upbringing and well adjusted family to boot (which is probably a large part of the reason WHY he has all of these other wonderful attributes) Let's call him "Sal"

ANYWAY, Sal's been gone for a good month and a half now...SO WTF????

What the fuck, what, you wonder? Well, I just received a phone call from him. Basically he was using his charm and, I felt, abusing his good standing at Doin Good in da Hood (everyone loved him) to get me to write a grant for some OTHER organization! Now, I know there is the positive spin on this: maybe he was seeing this as a favor to me, a way to enhance my grant skills by writing a grant for a completely different organization. But listen to this: he called the freaking Executive Director BEFORE calling me. Hmmmm, very interesting. I mean, I suppose he called him to get clearance on his asking me to do work.

I am sorry, but my bitchy ass felt like screaming into the phone, "Listen, you're NOT my boss ANYMORE! You DON'T work here anymore! You don't owe anyone anything." I mean, this woman who needed the help was a friend of his and he used to help her write grants on Doin Good in Hood's time! In all fairness, I think the Executive Director knows the woman at the organization. ANYWAY, I realize this is getting terribly boring, so I'll end it. I needed to vent and this is such a great forum for that! A la Messieur Jerry Springer here is my final thought on the matter:

Some of the most cunning leaders have used an intoxicating mix of charm and abuse of power to get what they want...

Jeff Buckley's Death

2007-07-07T08:09:00.000-07:00

Frozen blue voice with mud around it,
arise from the brown depths of the Mississippi,
this voice was
left behind, and
it drowned.

The drowning was foreshadowed,
in the words of a teenager,
angry and writing in her journal.
She misinterpreted his lyrics correctly.
Yes, there was a water theme in those lines
those moody lines of a cute, dirty white boy with a guitar.

The teenager, she lives in a cold place too
and she thinks she feels dead inside.
So

She is in harmony with his voice, naturally haunting,
coming from the thickness of Southern climate, the tepid mud of his final rest.
With eyes closed, the connection is closer, innate. She can see it all now

The way his life ends and how his words entombed.
All the nuances in the instruments, the inflections in his voice, the pattern of breathing:
they all came together somehow

And that gothy girl no one paid attention to,
the one even the poet feels embarrassed to have let enter,
Yes, that girl:
She foretold Jeff Buckley’s death
in a dirty beat up journal, tear-stained and all.

Getting my Queer On

2007-06-22T11:50:00.000-07:00

Yay! This weekend is Gay Pride Weekend! Yipee! Zoweee! Yay! I am very excited to express my gayness to the world. For the most part, I live the heterosexual life. I am in a committed hetero relationship, but don't let that fool you, no siree!

I'm coming out. I want to world to know, got to let it show...Much as I abhor labels, I am what you would call bisexual. Here is the bi pride flag

The symbolism of the flag is as follows: The pink color represents sexual attraction to the same sex only (gay and lesbian), the blue represents sexual attraction to the opposite sex only (straight) and the resultant overlap color purple represents sexual attraction to both sexes (bi). The key to understanding the symbolism in the Bi Pride Flag is to know that the purple pixels of color blend unnoticeably into both the pink and blue, just as in the 'real world' where most bi people blend unnoticeably into both the gay/lesbian and straight communities.

Yes and in the real world, I think oftentimes it goes a little something like this:
Hated by dykes, drooled over by lecherous hetero men, and ignored by gay men, it's a hard thing being bisexual. Too queer for the straight, too straight for the queer, it's a lose-lose situation. In a committed relationship? There is always the underlying, unspoken fear that the bi one in the relationship will run off seeking thrills of the opposite sex of the person with whom the bi is in a committed relationship with...it's all part of the sad image of bisexuals simply being confused and sex-crazed. O la la, le pauvre!

For the record, I am NOT a lecherous sex crazed manic and wouldn't dream of being unfaithful to the love of my life, my sweet sweet guy. I simply love people and have the capacity in my heart to fully love and be committed to either sex. I love the gray areas of life and am saddened by our black/white, straight/gay culture. The gray areas of life are what make life so pleasurable. Open your hearts to the beauties of the gay and you'll find a rainbow (holy shit, I can't believe I actually wrote something so corny, but hey I am a corny gal!).

Anyway, wherever you are and whoever you are, have a jolly ole gay weekend and remember, no matter WHAT your orientation, please support the cause. Only when LGBT issues are given more clout, exposure and support can we swim in the sea of the gray areas. Even if you are very comfortable in your black or white, support those who revel in the gay...I mean, Gray!

When stupid people procreate

2007-06-12T13:46:00.000-07:00

My sister sent me this pic and at first, I was like, "Okay, two people on a bike," but then upon closer inspection....dear God!

Kenny G loves Don Cheadle

2007-06-07T15:58:00.000-07:00

I think this photo is freaking great and so I want to share...enjoy!

Gross shit? Yes!

2007-06-07T15:11:00.000-07:00

The weather is glorious today in San Francisco, as is my custom on such days, I head off to the grassy area a few blocks from my work. It's a nice patch of grass on the Embarcadero, facing the Bay (yawn...I'm getting there, I'm getting there...)

As I seek out a nice spot to sit, enjoy my lunch and get some knitting done, my eyes are assaulted: a man, curled in semi-fetal position, clad only in some shit-stained tighty-whitties. Doth my eyes deceive me? I look again, even though it hurts.

Nope. This fool IS sleeping on the grass wearing nothing but some offensive dodo stained drawers. Hmmmm, what to do? I mean, this IS San Francisco, I can't say I was surprised, but how to place myself in a sweet spot and yet out of the field of vision of his gray and brown man panties? Fortunately for me, there was a great spot a few feet ahead of Sleeping Beauty. Of course, knowing that there was something so very wrong behind me, I couldn't help a couple of glances behind. Ugh (shiver)

This kind of thing happens to me ALL THE TIME. When I was in Junior High School, I was walking to my friend's house and came across a man walking in sweat pants. He was looking straight ahead (he appeared to be in a catatonic state) and had a perfectly round hole cut out of his crotch area. He was wearing no underwear and had a hard-on. That's the first time I saw a real penis. Damn that was gross, why man? Why?!! Right around this time, give or take a couple years, I also came across a man jerking off right outside his window--in plain glorious view. I was young and scared, so I told my Dad.

He got his gun and went out looking for the guy, but alas he came and went.

I won't even go into the times I've seen men masterbating on the subway. You get the idea....

I am privvy to this wrongness: my eyes want to know everything in this world, even the disgusting. Like why am I always the one, in a group of people, to spot exposed ass crack? Note the person peeing or shitting in the bush over there? Or catch the person pick their nose and then smell it or worse, take a taste? I suppose this kind of thing happens to everyone, but I often find myself saying, "Ill, did you see that?" "No."

All this thinking has given me that unclean feeling. See ya later, gotta go douche!

Hateration

2007-06-04T20:16:00.000-07:00

Enough of this wishy washy shit, I am going to list for once and for all the pros and cons of San Francisco versus Brooklyn. Born and raised in Brooklyn, NY with a smattering of New Hampshire and Paris living under my belt, a San Francisco resident for two years and going: OF COURSE this will be biased!

PROS
SF: beautiful landscapes abound, lots of opportunities to get outside and enjoy nature, great weather, relaxed vibe (I can't vouch for this outside of the Bay Area), medical marijuana (word), delicious fresh seafood and vegetables, okay so the streets are perhaps a wee cleaner than Brooklyn, but there are so many homeless people, so...hmmm, tough one

BKYLN: within driving and easy flying distance to a great number of cool places, seasons, stronger sense of early American history, Mama Mia a Brooklyn Pizza pie!, dude NYC is the shit, I am sorry it just is. (Hot dogs or complete Spaghetti Dinner at 4am anyone?) FAMILY!!!

CONS
SF: California is huge!, so pretty much when you live in Cali, you are in Cali, earthquakes, shitty drivers passive aggressive who may very well fuck you up should Road Rage come on (also SF is the first city I've lived in where I've thought "I may get hit by a car," locals call it the "California Stop" (okay), there's a beach but you can't swim in the water! (of course this is for SF only), oy vey where are the bagels? (and the Jews), expensive

BKLYN: shitty weather, crowded feeling, shitty aggressive drivers, East Coast cops suck! They will fuck with you just to fill a quota., expensive, dirty ass streets

This list is by no means complete. Next up: Durham NH versus Paris France--the duel to end all duels bitches!

Random ass photo I found in My Pictures folder. I have been informed by the guilty party that this is Alison Stokke, Pole Vault Champ, 18

She's bendy.

So fucking emo

2007-06-02T10:53:00.000-07:00

If I could figure out how to get songs onto my blog, well this page would be playing New Order, The Radio Dept., The Magnetic Fields, or any vase variety of emo bands. I am currently OBSESSED with the Marie Antoinette Soundtrack. The movie is the best visual and evocative representation of youth and opulence and the music....uh, sweet Jesus the MUSIC!!! Here, see the list of tracks: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marie_Antoinette_(soundtrack)

You can find art everywhere. I love the numerous forms it takes. Life is art. All of these things are art:

Light
Fashion
Media
Literature
Music
Film
Color
Black and White
Shapes
People
Animals
Nature

Okay, okay the list goes on...I would like to have a hand in each and every one! I am doing my best to live a life of art, but not in a pompous way, no: In a visceral and karmic way. In both my creations and my interaction with living creatures and the elements, I strive for a life rich, drenched in the beauties of art.

I want to live a beautiful life. Life is beautiful. It creates, gives and takes: it remains constant (you think...) while you make your way, somehow, through the things that "trap" you, your mind, your wants, your traumas.

I am often caught in my trappings of childhood. I beat myself up because I feel I am an adult and should be able to "get on with it" as those with balanced, well-rounded lives (often the result of happy childhoods) are apt to say. I am not jealous of these people in any way, on the contrary, I like to have a nice mix of both crazy people and sane, well-rounded people around me. It keeps life interesting and gives you perspective....

I can't STOP thinking about this awesome exhibit I saw last night!!! Vivienne Westwood: 36 Years of Fashion! Uh, mon Dieu! C'etait absolumente magnifique!!! Putain! I want to be a fabulous fashion designer! I want to rip up, sew, ruche, drape, knit, crochet my way to heaven!!! I get so fucking inspired by art, I can hardly stand it! Thing is, as I referenced earlier, I

ART!!!!!!!!

Woo Hoo! Yay! Yippee! Art is great! Woo Hoo, I want to be fabulous! I want to make stuff!!! I don't want to buy my clothes--I want to make them. Fashion is fabulous. Regular clothes are boring! I want to expand my sense of shape and form. I want to make some crazy funky shit. I want to learn the trade...let's see if this lasts, let's see if I pursue this budding dream!!! Yeah, YOU CAN DO IT!

Here some cool Vivienne Westwood pics/clothes:

Here's her famous Bondage Suit, worn by Johnny Rotten of The Sex Pistols back in the '70s:

Here's the artiste herself with her young man slice--you go girl!

Here's a beautiful jacket and skirt from 1993:

Alexander McQueen (another great designer) stuff on the left, classic Vivienne Westwood on the right:

Fish Oil!

2007-06-01T09:38:00.000-07:00

Ah sweet little golden pills o' bliss! Bring your fish funk down my trunk. I imagine the capsule bursting open inside and spreading good, gooey fish goodness all through my guts. This little pill packs a wallop, let me tell you!

Fish Oil is derived from the tissues of oily fish, such as salmon, albacore tuna, mackerel, herring, sardines, etc. It has many beneficial properties including reducing inflammation throughout the body, helps regulate cholestrol, it is good for the brain too! It helps alleviate depression (yipee! I feel like a kid sliding down a greasy Splish 'n Splash!) and promotes neuronal growth of the frontal cortes, the seat of personal behavior. Here is the Wikipedia entry, where I expanded my knowledge of this golden oval: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fish_oil

Let me tell you something too: Ever since I started taking them, about a month ago, my skin has seemed so smooth and radiant and my hair soft and shiny. Oil is good for you! Oh and for those worried about oil = fat. I have not noticed any weight gain, if anything I feel more Jane Fonda-ey, wanting to work out and energized to fight the power!

So, go, now...RUN don't walk to your nearest Fish Oil Provider and get yourself a little piece of sunshine!

Pedantry

2007-05-15T09:53:00.000-07:00

Pedantry, noun, plural-ries
1. the character, qualities, practices, etc., of a pedant, esp. undue display of learning.
2. slavish attention to rules, details, etc.
3. an instance of being pedantic: i.e., the pedantries of modern criticism.

I HATE pedantry and pedants. Yes, I am thinking of someone particular...some pretentious pedant. I am angry and no one is reading this blog, so I do what I want. I say what I want. I asked this pedant to write me a letter of recommendation, NOT a letter of criticism--WTF? Even as this pedant tries to write a glowing recommendation, he can not help but insert his ultra critical, pedantic beady eyes!

So, here's a bit of advice: When seeking help, don't seek a pedant. Their "slavish attention to rules, details, etc." will only work in your disfavor because their absolute adherence to what they feel is 100% true may result in less than stellar help. They are more interested in sticking to what they believe is absolutely true, maybe to your detriment. Uck...I am just disgusted by these kinds of people. I will never seek help from him again, Petar the Pedant. Quel con!

Because the Wrong is Right

2007-05-08T22:38:00.000-07:00

I like wrong things. When told to do one thing, I want to do the opposite. My rebellious nature is quelled by a gut-twisting desire to have things be, well, easy. It's hard doing wrong all the time. For one, I'd be broke because I know it's right to go to work, but I hate work.

Actually, let me rephrase: I hate 9 to 5 cubicle living. Human beings were not meant to sit in boxes for 8 hours, becoming pale and lifeless from lack of sunlight and a damaged natural biorhythm, scarfing food down at a desk in between often redundant meetings and yawn-inducing emails.

Yes. I am an angry bitch in the box, but I have armed myself with shovel and, slowly but surely am working my way out of this anathema.

ON OTHER WRONG NEWS:

John Waters rules!

He is the King of Wrong. My hero. He is a truly gifted media whore, adept at stretching his 15 minutes into a lifetime of ch-a-ching-ch-ching! My fave movie of his is Pecker, though I do enjoy his older stuff too, especially Desparate Living: what's not to like about the following plot (it's getting late and I've no time for too fancy blog manuvering) from IMBD: A rich housewife enlists her maid's help to murder her husband; they go on the lam and end up in Mortville, a homeless community built into a garbage dump. Characters include Muffy St. Jacques, Queen Carlotta, and Princess Coo Coo. Loves it! Not for the faint of heart or faint of stomach and high brow types, well, if you are even reading this than you probably aren't all that highbrow...Learn more about John here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Waters_(filmmaker)

Here's another one of my heroes:

Ah, Sinead Sinead...I've yet to meet a man with bigger balls than thee. She battles the hypocrisy of Catholicism and looks great doing it. I have such a crush on her. Her music is soulful and, well, yes she makes the "wrong" very right. Who knew one could rock a buzz cut? Sinead O'Connor, I raise my glass to you beeyotch!

I don't know if I've lured any bloggers into my sphere, but better things to come my pretties. Not sure I have much time for this, but I will try. In the meantime, listen to some music. My taste is eclectic so there should be something here for everyone. Happy Lewd Listening!

FUCK IT DIDN'T WORK AND MY ASS IN NUMB AND MY EYES HURT FROM TRYING TO WORK THIS OUT. MUST GET SLEEP. HERE'S A SONG:

oblah de oblah da life goes on...